I'm delighted this month to share a post from a very special someone who you've all seen here before. I'm talking of the delightful Roxanne/Roxy who churns out the soap and salves at Bodylushious. Sit back and enjoy these beautiful words from the sparkly & shiny Roxy.
Roxy, what does 'focus' mean for you in this time?
On the theme of focus this month, which is a great one to think of as we embark on a new year of the unknown. It’s easy to get lost and focus on all the bad news, hype, stories and drama. It feels like being stuck in thick, sticky black tar, you just can’t see a way out.
Where are you focussing your time and energy at the moment?
Is that the right place?
Are you even aware if it is or not?
My focus for too long has been on the lack of love, company, purpose, strong and healthy relationships. Trying to find happiness and completion in my external world. Through a romantic partner. A night out with friends and getting mashed, even sometimes forgetting what happened the night before. Through acceptance from friends and family. Searching for the perfect job/career.
What I wasn’t realising until very recently, is that what I was searching for in the external world is actually already within me. Love, acceptance, faith, certainty, purpose, being enough!
Maybe deep down I’ve always known this but too afraid to trust in it. Unsure how to tune into my body. Turning my attention and focus onto other people and not myself.
My question is, what was I so afraid of? Ever since I’ve decided to focus on me, magic is happening! It’s been a long journey to get to this point in my life. Everything that has happened in my life has played such an important part. I’m so grateful for it all. The good stuff, the bad and the damn right ugly!
So when I say I’m now focusing on me, what do I actually mean by this? It involves holding up a mirror and looking in to see which parts of my life do not serve me. Along with what and who I need to let go of. It involves some hard core boundaries, especially being the compassionate empath that I can be.
It involves putting myself and my needs first. It involves learning to speak up.
It involves creating space to be on my own. To ride the ebb and flow of those emotional waves. It involves giving into the night and binge watching a series on Netflix, drinking a glass of wine, even eating some chocolate! (not every night I’ll add!)
These are bizarre times and we’re all trying to get through this the best we can and live some kind of normal, but I can get caught out sometimes, unexpected. Feelings of fear can catch me off guard. All of a sudden I can feel really overwhelmed. I may be with my son at the time, and we’ll clash at these times. I’ll feel bad, then I’ll focus on that for a while. I can choose to get lost in those feelings of guilt, that I’m not showing up the best I can or being the best I can, but then I turn my focus to just being kind to myself. Reminding myself, these are not normal times. I am only human, so I turn my focus instead to just forgiving myself.
Reminding myself, this will pass. Nothing is permanent and we always have the option to change course, to start over.
With this new focus on myself, a creative door (which has always been there) has once again swung open.
I’m fully embracing it and diving in. In a short amount of time I have created a new project. It will be an opportunity for me to explore and share my deepest expressions through word and artwork.
I have a creative background. After my 3 years at university doing fashion/textile design, the joy of creating was sucked out my soul. Sounds dramatic, but so true. I just put the idea of a career in design away. Possibly even for the foreseeable future! For so long I have lost my sense of sparkle and light. In fact when I think about it, I’m not sure when I fully felt that sparkle and light. Until I finally surrendered and put my trust to the world that I have no control over. Once I turned my focus onto me, I now see what I’m sure others can see in me.
My spark. My buzz and joy for life.
So, with all of this changing my focus stuff, I have created Sparkle+Shine.
A new project run by me. Not for anybody else. I finally feel supported and I believe in myself. I think that may be the most important ingredient for anyone to start anything, is believing in yourself.
So let’s change our focus to that. Lets see what magic comes into your life.
& I thank you for stopping by for another Bodylushious Blog read x Bron
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